L.D.M
29-07-2008, 06:42 PM
Shamelessly stolen from another forum...
Question:
How do you tell the difference between a UK Police Officer, an Australian
Police Officer and an American Police Officer?
Answer:
Pose the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around
the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, and raises the knife
and charges.
You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere
seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?'
UK Police Officer's Answer:
1) Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
2) Does the man look poor or oppressed?
3) Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to
attack?
4) Could we run away?
5) Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife
out of his hand?
6) What does the law say about this situation?
7) Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message
does this send to society and to my children?
9) Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
10) Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?
11) If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he was stabbing me?
12) Should I call 9-9-9?
13) Why is this street so deserted?
14) We need to raise taxes, have a paint-and-weed day and make this
a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behaviour?
15) If I raise my gun and he turns and runs away; do I get blamed
when he falls over running away, knocks his head and kills himself?
16) If I shoot him, and lose the court case, does he have the
opportunity to sue me, cost me my job, my credibility and I will
lose my family home?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Australian Officer's Answer:
1) BANG!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
American Officer's Answer:
1) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click....(sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!!!!!!!!!!!
Click.
Daughter: “Nice grouping, Dad! Were those the Winchester
Silver Tips?''
Question:
How do you tell the difference between a UK Police Officer, an Australian
Police Officer and an American Police Officer?
Answer:
Pose the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around
the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, and raises the knife
and charges.
You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere
seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?'
UK Police Officer's Answer:
1) Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
2) Does the man look poor or oppressed?
3) Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to
attack?
4) Could we run away?
5) Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife
out of his hand?
6) What does the law say about this situation?
7) Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message
does this send to society and to my children?
9) Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
10) Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?
11) If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he was stabbing me?
12) Should I call 9-9-9?
13) Why is this street so deserted?
14) We need to raise taxes, have a paint-and-weed day and make this
a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behaviour?
15) If I raise my gun and he turns and runs away; do I get blamed
when he falls over running away, knocks his head and kills himself?
16) If I shoot him, and lose the court case, does he have the
opportunity to sue me, cost me my job, my credibility and I will
lose my family home?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Australian Officer's Answer:
1) BANG!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
American Officer's Answer:
1) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click....(sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!!!!!!!!!!!
Click.
Daughter: “Nice grouping, Dad! Were those the Winchester
Silver Tips?''