Speed Dating Report

[Rob Hannis]

Bear with me on this one (especially with spelling) as I've just got in and I'm feeling a bit fruity after lots of wife beater.

The dating service emphesised sophisticated people on the site so me and my mate drank a few cans and grabbed a burger on the way down.

We got down there at about 7, there were loads of obviously single women in the bar so we grabbed a beer.

After a while everyone dissapeared upstairs so we followed. The orginisation was sloppy but eventually all the women were seated and us guys were lead down.

The format was you had a bit of paper to mark down what you thought of each date and if you wanted to swap numbers. Now you had 3 mins with each woman, but that was no way long enough, I hardly had time to explain what fighting in cages meant before the time was up.

The women weren't too bad, infact some of the older ones were damn foxy, especially the one who was an ann summers rep! There were some who were real munter and 3 mins was a drag but some were well nice, hopefully they were taken in by me.

The bad thing was nearly everyone was like a job interview 'so what are you going to do when you finish uni?' was normally greeted by 'fight'. I'm sure they loved it though.

Pictures, results and a more sober round up to follow.

[Rob Hannis]

Why did I have hot chilli sauce on my kebab last night? It's really messed up my guts and every chilli seed that comes out burns.

Thinking I should have made more of an effort last night, I thought we were going to get to speak to all the women but as it wasn't very well organised I didn't get around them all. Consequently I was doing the nice thing and chatting to some dodgy women instead of picking all the sexiest ones.

One woman I talked to was an ann summers rep, she was in her 30s but was fit and would have to be filthy being an ann summers rep. Imagine all the toys she'd have to use on herself while I watched. :D

There was another woman who I spoke to who knew one of my lecturers at uni, that was bad. She didn't get a tick from me, apart from being minging she was well pissed.

One woman was absolutely grilling me, as soon as I sat down it was 20 questions. First one was 'What's the most exciting thing you've done' so the cage fighting line had to come in there. Then she asked 'what was my most embarrasing moment?', and I told her something I shouldn't have. It's that bad and embarrasing I wouldn't even tell you lot what it is.

There was one who I really liked, 31 and very sexy. She really flicked my switch but I can't remember her name.

Think I must owe some kind of commision on the 'I fight in cages' line for the ammount of use it had last night, although I'm sure they all thought I was a nutter.

Now just got to wait for the calls to flood in, although after seeing the lack of organisation last night I'm not holding my breath.

[Godders]

"I fight in cages"

Graham... what have you started mate :D

Sounds like a laugh Rob.

You could just speed up the process.

"How you doing?"
Then lift up your shirt and say
"Do you like my nipple?....

Do you want to touch it?

Do you want to rub it?

Do you want to lick it?"

Saves alot of hassle

[Blanka]

Is that the 2Sexy official approch to chatting up the ladies???:)

[Rob Hannis]

Sledge, it was all luck mate, I was lucky enough to be there!

I'll have to hold judgement on the 'I fight in cages' line until the phone starts ringing with loads of women wanting to know more, but I'm sure it made me stand out though.

I was thinking of the patented 2sexy nipple approach but a lack of facial hair (on my part) meant I was unsure of its' effectiveness.

Not holding out any hope though as the organisers were shit and I felt I could've worked harder.

In the end I reckon I only got to speak to about 20 women but I felt so drained afterwards from all the chit chat.

[astrobabe75]

If i had been told the "I have an enormous knob" line I 'd have asked to see it, then if it turns out 2 b true-cool and if not we have a laugh about it either way it breaks the ice!!!
The edge mc, wot u trying to say bout us women, that we r superficial??!! :D

[astrobabe75]

Thats a MASSIVE stereo type 2 be making!!!!!
I have been called many things but never predictable!
The line about "massive knobs" was completely fabricated, not being in2 one nite stands if i was getting intimate wiv some1 they would have 2 mean something to me- there4 the size wouldn't matter, we women (generalising here!) usually say that 2 wind men up, hell its the technique buddy!!!!!:p

[astrobabe75]

U've hurt my feelings now......:(

[Neil_Allen]

I had a feeling this was on the cards :D

Hannis any news?

[Rob Hannis]

Not good, I blame it on our age disadvantage and poor orginisation. If not then this must be the end and a life of self abuse is all that is on the cards for.

[astrobabe75]

No its me who should be sorry. was having a bad day that day and i think i took it 2 heart. normally i'd have thought of something witty to say but not that day
am going to start readings this week, have to do dougies wife and daughter, urself and maverick so i need u 2 pick 3 numbers between 0 and 63. once i get them i can do ur reading.
thanks hun :)

[Rob Hannis]

Things are looking up, I got a txt today saying 'your date(s) requests are ready' but I went training instead of picking them up but I'll let you know tomorrow who wants a bit of me.

[Rob Hannis]

shut the fuck up nikki, I couldn't care what you think. Change the record and get a life.

[Rob Hannis]

well why did you bring this thread back up to the top of the forum then?

Had they run out of brains when you got to the front of the que? Please more before you post, you just keep making yourself look dumber if that's possible.

[Rob Hannis]

you were looking through me? Wow you've got x ray vision? Best put my lead lined pants on then (lead blocks radiation as I guess you missed physics at school)

Now where in your reply does it prove your argument?

[Rob Hannis]

ok, I realise it takes you a long time to think of sensible replies.

[Rob Hannis]

aww, still jealous are we? Not seeing her tonight, need to have a night off and let the sacks refil.

[Rob Hannis]

she's sick of me? Right, this is about the first day we haven't seen each other in a week and that's only cos we're ill.

kimura, keep up the good work, flip reverse her butters arse.

[Rob Hannis]

I'm soo jealous of leigh now, he gets all the girls.

[Rob Hannis]

well done, you've picked up on sarcasm at last, however wtf is 'lieint' is that a word?

[Rob Hannis]

thanks, although the sentance still doesn't make sense. Bye bye, enjoy the salon, although it's probably a little difficult for you to understand.

[Rob Hannis]

I was refering to the low level of intelligence displayed by the muppets on the salon.