blackdogmma
16-11-2011, 11:52 PM
Recently i had to start working on the door of a local nightclub to bring in an extra bit of cash for the MMA club. The roof is still leaking, and its freezing in the classroom as the warehouse is full of holes that need patching.
Its not much of an exaggeration to say that i have been thinking of letting the students go stand outside to warm up a bit inbetween teaching techniques!
So my idea was to get some extra work and fund some improvements and hopefully gain enough students from the improvements to not need the extra work any more, where upon i can get back out of the rat race.
I've done security work in the past but because of the stiff fees for a doormans licence around here, i've never actually worked the door, just outdoor events security.
It's been a crazy experience, plenty of nutters, and stupid drunken idiots who need to be escorted off the premises, on my first night i hauled a guy out for brazenly sifting through girls bags/purses while they were on the dancefloor, another incident involved kicking a guy out for walking up behind a girl and unzipping her dress and trying to pull it down by whipping the shoulder straps off. He resisted as i walked him out holding onto door frames etc until i got him halfway out, and then he suddenly turned and ran upstairs (the direction i had been forcing him) to tell the head doorman and manager that i had assaulted him. they promptly kicked him out.
But the funniest incident happened last friday night, it was really slow and quiet, and already bored of the dancy music of the downstairs area, i went upstairs to the door and hung out there chatting with the other door staff. the fact that it was really cold outside was accurately demonstrated by how few people were outside smoking. the few guys that had braved the elements for a quick smoke were stood in the doorway of the fitness centre next door trying to keep out of the howling wind.
With nothing else to do i stood in our doorway waiting to ID any potential youngsters, and found i was close enough to hear the conversation of the smoking lads. " yeah, so he was asking for it so i just had to smash him" my interest was imediately piqued and i poked my head out to see who was talking. there were 4 lads out there, 3 penpushers from the local banks/finacial sector and one lad who seem to have the misfortune to be a member of a gym where the only piece of training equipment is a pec-deck.
"So what happened next?" asked one over eager penpusher
"the police came ,and wouldn't you know it, fucking little-dick, shit-for-brains and ugly-as-fuck left me on my own didn't they!" exclaimed pec-deck. (i may not be remembering the names of his comrades accurately, but it was something like that)
"so what did you do?" asked specky penpusher
"well i fought them off, there was only four of them so i just dropped them and then left the party before any reinforcements could arrive" rep(lied) pec-deck.
"thats why im back here, tho. i gotta lay low for a bit." said pec-deck
"well it was good to see you, lets go back in lads" said incredulous penpusher.
pec-deck clearly didnt want to lose his idolising audience and decided to come in for a drink with the lads. they were stood in the hall for a bit unable to decide if they should go into the upstairs bar or the downstairs bar. The penpushers had picked up their drinks from the table in the hall (you're not allowed to take your drink outside when you go out for a smoke) so they just loitered by the table. normally we are supposed to usher people into either bar and not let them hang out in the halls or stairs, but i was not about to miss out on this opportunity to hear more class A bullshit.
over the next 10 minutes he told them stories about him fighting in thai-boxing in thailand and how he had just got back from training for and competing in his first Cagefighting (read as :Kage foitin') match in vegas. he apparently won by tko in 48 seconds! it was at this point that i got involved in the conversation. i asked him what technique he used, and he said he dropped him with an over hand right then swarmed him with punches til the ref dragged him off. i started off friendly enough asking him about his diet and training regime, and slowly segued into more detailed stuff, until eventually my questions tipped my hand that i knew my stuff and he started getting suspicious.
"so why do you ask" he said, slipping his elbow up onto the nearby railing in what im sure he though was a hollywood worthy performance of nonchalance.
"well i was just curious, i wondered if you were finding it hard to find training partners while you were here" i said baiting the trap, although perhaps a better analogy would be loading my gun while standing next to the barrel of fish.
"well yeah, it has been tough" he replied, it could have been my imagination, but i sensed an internal struggle in him as he answered, as if on one side he wanted to keep up the charade, but on the other side he just wanted to make his excuses and leave.
"well i'd be happy to train with you while you are here" i eagerly remarked as if the prospect of training with a humanesque pec-freak like him was my life long dream.
"You?" he spluttered "why what training do you do?" he asked, as that little voice inside him cried out numerous realistic excuses for him having to leave suddenly.
"im the instructor at BlackdogMMA, the Islands only MMA team, we compete on the UK circuit, i realise we are not thailand or Vegas, but at least you can get a workout and keep skill atrophy at bay." i said, feeling a little sorry for him, i could just imagine that little voice now having moved onto the implausable excuses for leaving screaming at him to say anything, just lets get the fuck outta here.
" oh, cool errr.... yeah that sounds great, im up for that, i didnt know there was a club on the island" somewhere inside him lay the corpse of that little voice of reason and truth that had been left in him, and stood over that corspe was his inner wannabe, holding a bloody cudgel labelled "ego".
i gave him my phone number (his phone doesnt work on the Island apparently, only in America) and told him when classes were, and he left.
Strangely we haven't seen him in class yet.
TL;DR fuck you and read the fucking story!
p.s. thats for you evzy.
Its not much of an exaggeration to say that i have been thinking of letting the students go stand outside to warm up a bit inbetween teaching techniques!
So my idea was to get some extra work and fund some improvements and hopefully gain enough students from the improvements to not need the extra work any more, where upon i can get back out of the rat race.
I've done security work in the past but because of the stiff fees for a doormans licence around here, i've never actually worked the door, just outdoor events security.
It's been a crazy experience, plenty of nutters, and stupid drunken idiots who need to be escorted off the premises, on my first night i hauled a guy out for brazenly sifting through girls bags/purses while they were on the dancefloor, another incident involved kicking a guy out for walking up behind a girl and unzipping her dress and trying to pull it down by whipping the shoulder straps off. He resisted as i walked him out holding onto door frames etc until i got him halfway out, and then he suddenly turned and ran upstairs (the direction i had been forcing him) to tell the head doorman and manager that i had assaulted him. they promptly kicked him out.
But the funniest incident happened last friday night, it was really slow and quiet, and already bored of the dancy music of the downstairs area, i went upstairs to the door and hung out there chatting with the other door staff. the fact that it was really cold outside was accurately demonstrated by how few people were outside smoking. the few guys that had braved the elements for a quick smoke were stood in the doorway of the fitness centre next door trying to keep out of the howling wind.
With nothing else to do i stood in our doorway waiting to ID any potential youngsters, and found i was close enough to hear the conversation of the smoking lads. " yeah, so he was asking for it so i just had to smash him" my interest was imediately piqued and i poked my head out to see who was talking. there were 4 lads out there, 3 penpushers from the local banks/finacial sector and one lad who seem to have the misfortune to be a member of a gym where the only piece of training equipment is a pec-deck.
"So what happened next?" asked one over eager penpusher
"the police came ,and wouldn't you know it, fucking little-dick, shit-for-brains and ugly-as-fuck left me on my own didn't they!" exclaimed pec-deck. (i may not be remembering the names of his comrades accurately, but it was something like that)
"so what did you do?" asked specky penpusher
"well i fought them off, there was only four of them so i just dropped them and then left the party before any reinforcements could arrive" rep(lied) pec-deck.
"thats why im back here, tho. i gotta lay low for a bit." said pec-deck
"well it was good to see you, lets go back in lads" said incredulous penpusher.
pec-deck clearly didnt want to lose his idolising audience and decided to come in for a drink with the lads. they were stood in the hall for a bit unable to decide if they should go into the upstairs bar or the downstairs bar. The penpushers had picked up their drinks from the table in the hall (you're not allowed to take your drink outside when you go out for a smoke) so they just loitered by the table. normally we are supposed to usher people into either bar and not let them hang out in the halls or stairs, but i was not about to miss out on this opportunity to hear more class A bullshit.
over the next 10 minutes he told them stories about him fighting in thai-boxing in thailand and how he had just got back from training for and competing in his first Cagefighting (read as :Kage foitin') match in vegas. he apparently won by tko in 48 seconds! it was at this point that i got involved in the conversation. i asked him what technique he used, and he said he dropped him with an over hand right then swarmed him with punches til the ref dragged him off. i started off friendly enough asking him about his diet and training regime, and slowly segued into more detailed stuff, until eventually my questions tipped my hand that i knew my stuff and he started getting suspicious.
"so why do you ask" he said, slipping his elbow up onto the nearby railing in what im sure he though was a hollywood worthy performance of nonchalance.
"well i was just curious, i wondered if you were finding it hard to find training partners while you were here" i said baiting the trap, although perhaps a better analogy would be loading my gun while standing next to the barrel of fish.
"well yeah, it has been tough" he replied, it could have been my imagination, but i sensed an internal struggle in him as he answered, as if on one side he wanted to keep up the charade, but on the other side he just wanted to make his excuses and leave.
"well i'd be happy to train with you while you are here" i eagerly remarked as if the prospect of training with a humanesque pec-freak like him was my life long dream.
"You?" he spluttered "why what training do you do?" he asked, as that little voice inside him cried out numerous realistic excuses for him having to leave suddenly.
"im the instructor at BlackdogMMA, the Islands only MMA team, we compete on the UK circuit, i realise we are not thailand or Vegas, but at least you can get a workout and keep skill atrophy at bay." i said, feeling a little sorry for him, i could just imagine that little voice now having moved onto the implausable excuses for leaving screaming at him to say anything, just lets get the fuck outta here.
" oh, cool errr.... yeah that sounds great, im up for that, i didnt know there was a club on the island" somewhere inside him lay the corpse of that little voice of reason and truth that had been left in him, and stood over that corspe was his inner wannabe, holding a bloody cudgel labelled "ego".
i gave him my phone number (his phone doesnt work on the Island apparently, only in America) and told him when classes were, and he left.
Strangely we haven't seen him in class yet.
TL;DR fuck you and read the fucking story!
p.s. thats for you evzy.