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Thread: Storyss?

  1. #21

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    Edit..More sober now relise how fucking dumb that sounded lmfao!
    Last edited by James Saville; 22-09-2009 at 11:30 PM.
    being empty of yourself you cannot be attacked because you arent filled by you.

  2. #22
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    The time goes by, i'm waiting anxiously to be called out, blood is rushing through my body, the adrenalin is pumping, when is it gonna be time?
    My gloves are taped, my gumshield fitted, it's time.
    As i walk down several stairs I finally reach the doorway.
    I hear my name being called, music starts playing, everything ive learnt is spinning around my head, I start to panic, How am I gonna do this?
    I finally reach the cage door,as I make my way in everything changes, i'm staring at my opponent knowing its almost time.
    The sharp sound of the bell echos across the venue, we both rush out to touch gloves to show our respect.
    And now i'm pinned against the cage, camera shining in my face. What have i gotten myself into?
    The minutes go by, i'm getting exhausted, I take a look up at the clock to see theres only ten seconds left, The sound of the bell echos through the venue once
    again, I feel a sign of relief as I stagger my way towards the corner. I take a look about to see fans cheering, but still knowing I have another round to go, makes me feel even more sick.
    Ounce again the bell is rang, but despite our respect for each, I decide to make a horrible choice, His gloves raise to show his respect, but with the adrenalin still pumping, I decide its time,
    I start swinging, hoping to put a end to this pain and take my first victory, but all off a sudden, my head all dizzy, my eyes just coming back into focus, I hear the referre shouting my name, Have I won?
    I finally come round, and see ambulance crew around me, what's happend? After around 5 minutes I manage to stand up to find out I had been knocked out, after all this training, I feel I let my team down.
    The announcer steps into the ring, wearing his black and white suit, the Ref grabs my arm, "And the winerrr By Knockout iss.." I put my head down in shame, as I recive a small trophy to show my efforts, I slowly
    make my way to the Exit, I think to myself, "Is this really what I want to do?" ...

    -----

    Got this so far, Middle/end.. now Need to make a beggining, then change bits to make it sound better.
    done this in around 20mins, and i got a week to do it

  3. #23
    The King of Crase DanCrase's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pauljono1120 View Post
    The time goes by, i'm waiting anxiously to be called out, blood is rushing through my body, the adrenalin is pumping, when is it gonna be time?
    My gloves are taped, my gumshield fitted, it's time.
    As i walk down several stairs I finally reach the doorway.
    I hear my name being called, music starts playing, everything ive learnt is spinning around my head, I start to panic, How am I gonna do this?
    I finally reach the cage door,as I make my way in everything changes, i'm staring at my opponent knowing its almost time.
    The sharp sound of the bell echos across the venue, we both rush out to touch gloves to show our respect.
    And now i'm pinned against the cage, camera shining in my face. What have i gotten myself into?
    The minutes go by, i'm getting exhausted, I take a look up at the clock to see theres only ten seconds left, The sound of the bell echos through the venue once
    again, I feel a sign of relief as I stagger my way towards the corner. I take a look about to see fans cheering, but still knowing I have another round to go, makes me feel even more sick.
    Ounce again the bell is rang, but despite our respect for each, I decide to make a horrible choice, His gloves raise to show his respect, but with the adrenalin still pumping, I decide its time,
    I start swinging, hoping to put a end to this pain and take my first victory, but all off a sudden, my head all dizzy, my eyes just coming back into focus, I hear the referre shouting my name, Have I won?
    I finally come round, and see ambulance crew around me, what's happend? After around 5 minutes I manage to stand up to find out I had been knocked out, after all this training, I feel I let my team down.
    The announcer steps into the ring, wearing his black and white suit, the Ref grabs my arm, "And the winerrr By Knockout iss.." I put my head down in shame, as I recive a small trophy to show my efforts, I slowly
    make my way to the Exit, I think to myself, "Is this really what I want to do?" ...

    -----

    Got this so far, Middle/end.. now Need to make a beggining, then change bits to make it sound better.
    done this in around 20mins, and i got a week to do it
    I wrote this in 10 seconds;

    "I'm a fuckin cagefightaaah; no ruuuules!, WHAT!?"

    I like mine

  4. #24

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    I Is Fiter


    Career highlight video
    Team Fulinkazan "The will to win compares little with the will to prepare to win"

  5. #25

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    make sure you get your spelling right, the title of an english course work thread spelt 'storyss',lol

    describe the training you do, make it emotive. may get browny points if you describe it well as you'll be having a teacher who's not a scooby about mma getting quite enthralled. i always found writing about things the lecturer knew nothing about and opening their eyes to something new always got you better marks.
    "The more you sweat in peace, the less you bleed in war"
    GFT

  6. #26
    My cat's name is Mittens ralphylad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pauljono1120 View Post
    Yeah, I hate english.

    School was okay, they gave you things to write about.

    I gotta make something up myself now.
    not a bad poem that Paul!
    "I honestly can't even remember my old signature, so I'll have this one"

  7. #27

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    On the subject of school/college, turns out my A-level media studies teacher is a fan of MMA and went to a party that some of the Gracies were at a number of years ago! (my teacher's Brazilian).
    http://www.kendallgrovemma.com/


    "You fucked his wife, fucked his fucking wife, you fucking wife fucker, you fucked his fucking wife you wife-fucking cunt, another mans wife? You stupid? You fucking thick you cunt? Fuck another mans wife? You don't do that!"

    - Stephen Dillane

  8. #28

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    on my way to the cage
    I am getting taught a lesson
    on my way to the cage
    I am choking on the medicine
    on my way to the cage
    I am stepping hard on
    four leaf clovers
    on my way to the cage
    I'm learning the same
    thing over and over

    on my way to the cage
    the taste of blood is in my mouth
    on my way to the cage
    the fear is in their eyes
    on my way to the cage
    my animal blood is pure
    on my way to the cage
    no regrets and no last words

    on my way to the cage
    I heard the crowd roar
    those of you alone behind me
    I couldn't ask for more
    the lights are almost blinding
    come closer
    tears open my eyes
    and fear me and fear me

    your soul is on a leash
    your mind is on a string
    your world's inside my fist
    you put yourself above me
    but there's something
    that you missed

    you'll always say you'll hate me
    but you'll watch me anyway
    its a pain
    you can't resist

    on my way to the cage
    I'm looking at life
    and laughing at death
    on my way to the cage
    I'm tripping on pain
    and feeling fine
    on my way to the cage
    you're paying your price
    and I'm paying mine
    on my way to the cage
    I'm watching you cry
    and wave good-bye

    on my way to the cage
    I heard the crowd roar
    those of you alone behind me
    I couldn't ask for more
    the lights are almost blinding
    come closer
    tears open my eyes
    and fear me and fear me

    your soul is on a leash
    your mind is on a string
    your world's inside my fist
    you put yourself above me
    but there's something
    that you missed

    you'll always say you'll hate me
    but you'll watch me anyway
    its a pain
    you can't resist

    Rollins Band, 1997
    Last edited by Craig; 24-09-2009 at 10:01 PM.

  9. #29
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    I make my way in at around 3:00pm, ready for the medical examination, everything seems to be fine, so I make my way down to the Venue, to see the cage still being
    setup, I start to get a nervous feeling as I see hundreds of chairs around, thinking this is gonna be full with people watching, I start to feel a bit agitated and shaky, as I know in less than a few hours, i'm
    gonna be inside that cage.
    I walk over to the nearest table, and take a look at the well prepared fight card, to find out i'm on first, I started to feel a bit panicky. but still remmebering it cant be as hard as it looks right?

    The time goes by, i'm waiting anxiously to be called out, blood is rushing through my body, the adrenalin is pumping, also remmebering to try and not make a fool of myself,
    My gloves are taped, my gumshield fitted, its time,
    As i walk down several stairs I finally reach the doorway,
    I hear my name being called, music starts playing, everything ive learnt is spinning around my head, I start to panic, How am I gonna do this?
    I finally reach the cage door, to be searched for things I shouldnt have, as I make my way in everything changes, i'm staring at my opponent who I must admit, looks a scarier than i do.
    The sharp sound of the bell echos across the venue, we both rush out to touch gloves to show our respect.
    We both circle each other like wolfes, waiting for someone to throw the first punch, the crowd is screaming, I finally throw a punch which sadly misses,
    He swings one at me, I get hit, my body isnt used to this pain, i start to freeze, is this really what i enjoy?
    After a few minutes of trading punches, I get a sick feeling, wishing I was somewere else right now, but hey this could be a win, so I decide to ignore the sickness
    and try my best.
    And now i'm pinned against the cage, camera shining in my face. What have i gotten myself into?
    He manages to get me down, I start to panic as I must admit, he was alot stronger than I was, I try to keep focused looking for openings for a quick submission, but don't get any luck.
    The minutes go by, despite my fitness level i'm getting exhausted, I take a look up at the clock to see theres only ten seconds left, The sound of the bell echos through the venue once
    again, I feel a sign of relief as I stagger my way towards the corner, luckily the adrenaline is keepng the pain off, I take a look about to see fans cheering, but still knowing I have another round to go, makes me feel even more sick.

    Ounce again the bell is rang, but despite our respect for each, I decide to make a idiotic choice, His gloves raise to show his respect, but with the adrenalin still pumping, I decide its time,
    I start recklessly swinging, hoping to put a end to this and take my first victory, but all off a sudden, my head all dizzy, my eyes just coming back into focus, I hear the referre shouting my name, Have I won?
    I finally come round, and see my team around me, what's happend? After around 5 minutes off feeling a bit confused, I manage to stand up to find out I had been knocked out, after all this training, I feel I let my team down.
    The announcer steps into the ring, wearing his black and white suit, the Ref grabs my arm, "And the winerrr By Knockout iss.." I put my head down in shame, as I recive a small trophy to show my efforts, I slowly
    make my way to the Exit, thinking to myself.. "Is this really what I wanted to do?"...

    -------------

    Thats my first draft so far, around 700 words.
    It's pretty shit atm, but it's a start.
    I hope the teacher can help me improve this, LOL.


    Note: The grammar is fucked on this, as I had to do it on notepad and got sick of scrolling across.

  10. #30

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    Is this for level 9 SATS? Anyway, your english is pretty basic but then again it is a draft.

    If I were you, i'd just read plenty of fiction books, it'll give you loads of ideas on how to write. Also if your doing a story in first person, it's probably better to go into more description if its for school.

    I suggest a story about Jay Darrell's struggle to the top.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNxFq8PJfng
    Short 5 minute documentary on Leicester Shootfighters made by me. Watch and enjoy

    http://www.leicestershootfighters.co.uk

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