This man pulls up in his Merc beside a little boy.
He opens the door, holds out a brown paper bag of sweets and says, "Hey kid, if I give you a sweetie, will you come in my car "
To which the kid replies, "Gimme the bag and I'll come in your mouth!"
This man pulls up in his Merc beside a little boy.
He opens the door, holds out a brown paper bag of sweets and says, "Hey kid, if I give you a sweetie, will you come in my car "
To which the kid replies, "Gimme the bag and I'll come in your mouth!"
They guy who invented Burpees , is a secret child molester
My 16 year old son asked me what a vagina looks like.
"Well" I said knowingly,"It has 2 different looks. "Before sex it looks like a beautiful rose with delicate pink folds."
"What about after sex?" asked my son.
"Well" I said . "Have you ever seen a bulldog eating porridge ?"
"He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"
haha id have an excuse if it was 6 pages away, but 6 posts away. i need to concentrate more lol.Hahaha! Yeah matey about 5 or 6 posts up ^^
Good joke though, whoever posted it must be a funny guy
hahah nice joke
Blonde Sharon says to her mate "Look at that flock of cows"
"Herd of cows, you daft slapper" replies Trace
"Of course Ive heard of cows, theres a fucking flock of them over there!"
"He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"
lol
'........
A gyppo girl is about to get married.
Her mum says, "Emerald, you do realise that when you're married your husband will want to stick his most prized possession in to where you piss?" The daughter replies, "Shut up Ma, how the fuck's he gonna fit his Transit van in the sink?"
"He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"
stolen from DNBA...
Horse walks in to a bar. Barman says "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and unable to understand the complexities of conversation, walks to the middle of the bar and shits on the floor
In todays England training session, Rooney collects the ball and dribbles round Ashley Cole, Wright Phillips, Heskey,Ferdinand and lastly Micah Richards.
Fabio Capello shakes his head and shouts:"Cones Wayne, I said go round the fucking cones".
Two spiders walking across the top of a box of cornflakes, suddenly one of the spiders sprints off into the distance, the other spider scurries along to catch up with him, and asks him why he suddenly started running. The other spider responds 'It said tear across the dotted line'
A woman on her deathbed called her husband and asked him to open a box from under the bed.
Inside he found 3 eggs and £7000 in cash.
"What's the eggs for?" Asks the husband.
She replied "Every time we had crap sex I would put an egg in the box.
"Not bad" says the husband, "3 eggs in 35 years. And the cash?" he asks.
Wife replies, "Every time I got a dozen I sold them".
"He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"