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Thread: >> Post A Joke <<

  1. #481

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    My neighbour knocked on my door at 2.30am this morning, can you believe that 2.30am?

    Luckily for him I was still up playing my drums...........
    "He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

  2. #482

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    Quote Originally Posted by Eric Morecambe View Post
    My neighbour knocked on my door at 2.30am this morning, can you believe that 2.30am?

    Luckily for him I was still up playing my drums...........
    LOL. many classics - keep em coming

  3. #483
    proud to be brown vileniall's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eric Morecambe View Post
    My neighbour knocked on my door at 2.30am this morning, can you believe that 2.30am?

    Luckily for him I was still up playing my drums...........
    is it a coincidence eric, that that joke was on the radio just minutes before your post?

  4. #484

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    Quote Originally Posted by vileniall View Post
    is it a coincidence eric, that that joke was on the radio just minutes before your post?
    Are they banging those funny jokes out on the "Wireless" as well eh ??

    Wwweeeyy Hhhheeeyy !

    That Wireless is going to kill me, because ..
    "If I hear anymore Des 'O' Connor, I'm goin' to be a gonna !"
    "He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

  5. #485

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    I say, I say, I say ..
    What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?

    " Roberto "
    "He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

  6. #486

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    My comedy pal Bernard Manning was trying out ventriloquism on his show. He had his dummy on his knee,starts tellin the usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde shouts,
    “ Ive heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes! Whats the colour of a persons hair to do with their worth as a human being? Its men like you who keep woman like me from being respected!”
    Bernard was just about to hit back at her, when the blonde shouts ..
    “You stay out of this mate! Im talking to that little git on your knee!

    Bernard laughs and shakes his head ….

    “Listen love aint you allergic when you leave the kitchen.”
    “My wife does .. Her eyes swell up and go black !!!”
    "He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

  7. #487

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    I'm in trouble with the wife ..
    We were in bed naked and she asked me what I would like to do most with her body.

    My reply of " Identify it " was'nt the right answer ...
    "He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

  8. #488

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    I haven't been feeling myself since I gave up masterbation ..
    "He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

  9. #489

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    My friend asked me to look after his Sex Shop for an 1hr or so, whilst he went to the Bank.
    A man walked in and asked for a penis enlarger .

    I gave him a magnifying glass ...
    "He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

  10. #490

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    A man has been accused of stabbing 6 people to death with knitting needles ...

    In my mind, he seems to be following some sort of pattern !!!
    "He’ll never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

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