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  1. #681

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    How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
    Put it in a microwave untill it's Bill Withers.
    Styles Change - Style Doesn't

    Twitter @mwsfc

  2. #682

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    Just got back from a good mates funeral, he died after being hit on the head by a Tennis ball, it was a lovely service!
    Chris.
    For all of your Cage Hire requirements P:M me, I also have a fully loaded lighting rig, warm-up mats available too.
    www.grrr.tv or www.angrrrmanagement.com

  3. #683

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    I told Ernie the other day I thought I'd found the oldest Fighter to have lived, on a headstone ...
    He was 200 and his name was Miles from London ...
    "He値l never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

  4. #684

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    President Clinton looks up from his disck in the oval office to see one of his aides nerviously approaching him. "What is it?" sighs the president. "It's the abortiion bill Mr. President. What do you want me to do about it?" the aide asks. "Go ahead and pay it." says the president.
    Sherdog.com - The number one MMA site on the web today!

  5. #685

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    Quote Originally Posted by RKing85 View Post
    President Clinton looks up from his disck in the oval office to see one of his aides nerviously approaching him. "What is it?" sighs the president. "It's the abortiion bill Mr. President. What do you want me to do about it?" the aide asks. "Go ahead and pay it." says the president.
    LOL! Love it hahaha

  6. #686

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    Took Mrs Morecambe's Shih Tzu out the other day for a walk ..
    Walked passed the local ... Could'nt resiste it, so went to have a pint.
    'Sorry Eric, guide dogs only' said the landlord.
    'This is my guide dog'.
    'No Eric, guide dogs are Labradors'.
    ' God, what have they given me then?'
    "He値l never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

  7. #687

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    I phoned the police the other day. ''Whats your emergency?'' they asked. I said
    ''There's 2 girls fighting over me!'' ''Ok'' she paused, ''Whats the problem?''
    ''The fat one's winning!!''

  8. #688

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    Sad news my friends ...

    I've been having trouble with my Springer Spaniel so I took him to a dog whisperer for some advice .
    He told me that he could'nt do anything for me , but suggested I should take him to a Animal Physiologist.

    After the first consultation, the Physiologist suggested that I leave him there for a month ..

    Today was the day I went back to see how they got on and its not good news.

    After a month of analysis and various tests he has found a condition with my Springer for which there is no known cure ..

    When I asked what the condition was, he replied "He's just a little shit Mr Morecambe"

    "He値l never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

  9. #689

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    I bought a christmas tree today.

    Ernie asked me if I was going to put it up myself. I said, "No, I'll probably put it in the living room"
    "He値l never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

  10. #690

    Default

    Ernie and I got a phone call today to do a show at a Fire Station .

    We went down there ...

    Turned out it was a bloody hoax ...
    "He値l never sell any ice cream going at that speed"

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