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Thread: A Call Centre Tribute

  1. #1

    Default A Call Centre Tribute

    Hey hey, I'm just out of uni so playing the waiting game and got work in a call centre to get some cash in. Inbound for a big corporation, absolute shite.

    Who all here has had the joy of working in the modern day sweat shops we call call centres? If so share you're funny stories with us.

    I remember insuring a 40 year old central heating system with subsequently blew up costing the poor lad thousands, the p45 was in the post after that!

  2. #2


    i used to work in one. we used to use an internal message thing like msn to send words to each other to drop into the convo. we had an old woman with us who was rubbish and would piss herself laughing all the time causing most customers to put the phone down

    i once had to tell a company that a whole wagon full of their tv's had been stolen and that they were covered for a maximum of 100 per consignment, every single last tv happened to be part of 1 big freight consignment. that was a fun call to make

  3. #3


    Hahaha I'd hate to have to call that company up

    Is it just me but are callers from the London area always complete cunts, seriously!

  4. #4


    I did it many years ago. Customer service for a hardware maintenance company. Taking calls about broken printers etc. Boring as fuck but was some fit birds in the office I got to bang. Also banged a girl from City Link couriers I met over the phone there. .
    I'm no gynecologist but I know a cunt when I see one.

  5. #5


    Why do you have to lie all the time sledge

  6. #6


    it was city link that i worked for

  7. #7


    Ive worked in a few call centres. PC Service, Vodafone. fucking hated it! I work in a call centre now, selling god damn asset labels. seriously dull shite, I would say it pays the dosent! hate it hate it hate it!

    I work so hard out of work to be the best I can be, to work for myself, had up to here with working for someone else who never appreciates the work you do. I feel like am in the film "Breaking Down" or "Ground Hog Day" perhaps I will go postal one day.

    aaaaaand relaaaaax (ive not been to the gym for a week now, can u tell)
    I don't believe in belts. There should be no ranking system for toughness.

  8. #8
    My cat's name is Mittens ralphylad's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007


    yeah I've served my time, selling monitored alarm systems, the company was investigated by watchdog, they were a pack of cunts to be fair!
    I worked with a guy who thought it was the best job in the world because he could bring his playstation to work, I did have the odd go on Tenchu though!, you have to dont you!
    "I honestly can't even remember my old signature, so I'll have this one"

  9. #9


    I used to sell personal protection insurance (PPI) for Northern Rock.

    You know how you see those adverts on daytime TV now about personal loans people have taken out with PPI, and how you can reclaim the cost if it was mis-sold? Well I was one of the people that missold it. Seriously it used to be ridiculous the tricks people would pull to get the PPI on a loan because it was all commission based. I couldn't get any enthusiasm for selling the shit because it was such a lousy product so every so often I'd have to listen in on the calls the 'top sellers' were making, and it turned out their figures were great because they were either:

    * Telling the customer they couldn't have a loan if they didn't take the PPI with it.
    *Just putting the PPI in with the loan without mentioning it, and taking the commission before the customer could read the papers and (maybe) return it.
    *Only quoting for a loan including PPI and hoping the customer didn't notice it.

    And the product was utter shit! It turned out that there were so many exceptions that it was as good as worthless. The idea was that if you were ill, unemployed or otherwise unable to pay the loan then the insurance would pay it for you. However, it would only do so once for every single instance of illness or injury (so if an illness recurred it wouldn't pay out) and would only do so for a maximum of 12 months - so if you became permanently disabled and unable to work, after 1 year the company would be knocking at your door for the loan payments (and brilliantly, the insurance premiums too). I worked out once that if you took the insurance out for the full term of the loan, statistically it was impossible to be able to claim enough money to outweigh what you were paying in premiums.

    Complete shit and a very miserable time of my life haha

    Career highlight video
    Team Fulinkazan "The will to win compares little with the will to prepare to win"

  10. #10


    Its the whinging cunts on the other end of the line and the boring bastard managers with their 'stats' that do my head in. Theres even 'toilet time'. I'll never know how people can stick those places out for years.

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